Ever hear a joke so dumb that it actually hurts to laugh? If you are ready to experience the kind of humor that makes you think, “Why did I just read that?” then you have come to the right place. These very stupid jokes aren’t just for laughs — they are for those who enjoy the kind of comedy that doesn’t need to make sense to be funny.
Whether you are in the mood for some totally ridiculous punchlines or just need to roll your eyes at something absurd, you are find all the stupidity you need right here. So, buckle up — it’s going to be a bumpy (and hilarious) ride!
Very Stupid Jokes
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field… but he’s still just a stuffed dummy.
- I asked the librarian if the library had any books on self-harm. She said, “No, we only have books on patience.” So I threw one at her.
- What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.
- I tried to catch some fog yesterday. I mist.
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
- Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side.
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
- Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she’ll let it go.
- What did one hat say to the other? “Stay here, I’m going on ahead.”
- Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
- What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house? The living room.
- Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish.
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
- I tried to start a band called “1023MB,” but we haven’t got a gig yet.
- I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
- Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose.
- What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.
- Why don’t ants ever get sick? Because they have tiny ant-bodies.
- Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- I told my computer I needed a break… now it won’t stop sending me coffee mugs.
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
- Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
- How do you organize a space party? You planet.
- What’s brown and sticky? A stick.
- Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.
- I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
- I would tell you a joke about an elevator, but it’s an uplifting experience.
If you think stupid jokes can’t get scientific, think again! Chemistry love jokes like “Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re Cu-Te!” are perfect examples of brainy humor that’s so dumb it’s genius. Check out more amazing chemistry love jokes to tickle your science-loving funny bone.
Very Funny Stupid Jokes
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
- What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
- I’m trying to lose weight, but it’s not working. I’m on a seafood-only diet – I see food and eat it!
- Why did the belt get arrested? For holding up a pair of pants.
- I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
- How do cows stay up to date with current events? They read the moos-paper.
- I couldn’t figure out how to put my seatbelt on, so I just fastened my pants.
- Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
- Why did the scarecrow break up with the farmer? He found her too corny.
- What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.
- What’s brown and sounds like a bell? DUNG.
- How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up in a tree and act like a nut!
- Why did the chicken join a band? Because it had drumsticks!
- What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.
- I’m reading a book on reverse psychology… don’t bother picking it up.
- Why was the broom late? It swept in.
- What do you call a pile of cats? A meow-tain.
- I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.
- Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.
- I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
- What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam!
- Why did the music teacher go to jail? Because she got caught with a high note!
- Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
- What does a cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear.
- Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
Love English class? Even if you don’t, some ELA jokes are so bad they’re actually good. For instance, “Why was the pencil crying? It was feeling pointless.” Genius, right?
Conclusion
Well, if you have made it this far, you’ve clearly survived the hilariously awkward journey through the land of very stupid jokes. Whether you were laughing, groaning, or questioning your life choices (we definitely did), we hope these ridiculous punchlines brought a smile to your face. After all, sometimes the best way to brighten your day is with a dose of pure, unfiltered nonsense. So next time you need a laugh, just remember: very stupid jokes are always here to save the day!
