Hand Puns That Are a Thumb-Stopper and Finger-Lickin’ Funny

When I was a kid, I tried to trace my hand on paper for a turkey drawing, but instead it looked like a chicken who had been in a boxing match. Ever since then, hands have been part of my funniest stories.
Hand puns always get me giggling, probably because they are the one kind of humor that never slips through my fingers. So grab a hand, high five yourself, and get ready to laugh until you can barely hold it together.

Hand Puns One Liners

1. I gave my friend a hand, now he owes me a glove.
2. Do not bite the hand that memes you.
3. On the other hand, these jokes are handy.
4. Hand me the remote, it is pun o’clock.
5. I handled that joke with care.
6. High five for surviving Monday.
7. I tried putting my hand in my pants pocket but it felt like a magic disappearing act.
8. This humor is out of hand.
9. Some jokes just slip through my fingers.
10. I will clap back with another pun.
11. It is a handful, but worth it.

Broken Hand Puns

1. I tried to break into comedy, but I broke my hand instead.
2. The joke fell flat, just like my casted hand.
3. I am clapping in spirit, my hand is out of commission.
4. You could say my humor is fractured.
5. I gave a weak handshake, blame the cast.
6. I am in pieces, literally and pun-fully.
7. This story is gripping, unlike my hand.
8. My handwriting is worse than ever.
9. The doctor said to take it one hand at a time.
10. I cannot handle this situation, literally.

Hand and Finger Puns

1. I fingered out the joke eventually.
2. You nailed that pun perfectly.
3. I thumb through these jokes daily.
4. Do not point fingers, point puns.
5. That joke rings true.
6. I am knuckling down on humor.
7. My hand got stuck hanging ornaments and now the tree has claimed me as decoration.
8. I pinky swear these puns are fresh.
9. Hands down, fingers up, I won.
10. I palm my face at these jokes.
11. Jokes like this just click.

Hand Washing Puns

1. Clean hands, dirty puns.
2. I soap you find this funny.
3. Scrub-a-dub-dub, pun in the tub.
4. Wash your hands of bad humor, keep mine.
5. This joke is squeaky clean.
6. Foam and laughter everywhere.
7. I rinsed and repeated this pun.
8. Do not hand me excuses, just sanitizer.
9. Soap-er funny jokes incoming.
10. Washing away the boredom one pun at a time.

Missing Hand Puns

1. I was left hanging, literally.
2. I lost a hand, but not my humor.
3. This story is short-handed.
4. I still clap, just in spirit.
5. I am one hand short of applause.
6. Do not worry, I can still lend a hand.
7. The scissor slipped from my hand and suddenly the haircut became a modern art piece.
8. I keep a grip on laughter, even if half is missing.
9. Hand it to me, or what is left of me.
10. I am un-handed but not un-funny.
11. I palm off excuses with one less hand.

Puns With the Word Hand

1. I handed in my resignation to bad humor.
2. I handled that situation smoothly.
3. Hand-crafted jokes are the best.
4. I am handing out laughs for free.
5. You cannot out-handle me.
6. This humor is hand-picked.
7. Hand down, this is funny.
8. I will give you a hand with laughter.
9. Hand-written humor beats typed jokes.
10. It is first-hand comedy gold.

Hand Injury Puns

1. I sprained my hand clapping for these jokes.
2. Injured but still pun-derful.
3. My hand is wrapped, unlike my brain.
4. This comedy is bandaged but intact.
5. That fall was not funny, but this is.
6. I grew a mustache so impressive it deserves its own round of applause from my hand.
7. I am healing hand over fist.
8. Painful but still handy.
9. My injury is serious, but my humor is sillier.
10. Clapping hurts but laughing helps.
11. The injury was bad, but the puns are gripping.

Hand Puppet Puns

1. This story is hand-made entertainment.
2. My puppet has a finger for drama.
3. Talk to the hand, it has a puppet show.
4. Hand puppets always pull the strings.
5. Clap for the puppet, not the puppeteer.
6. It is a gripping performance.
7. Sock it to me with more humor.
8. Hand puppets always nail the punchline.
9. Finger puppets are handy too.
10. Puppets get all the applause.

Tiny Hand Puns

1. Small hands, big laughter.
2. Tiny hands still pack a punch.
3. I clap softly but effectively.
4. Little hands make big puns.
5. It is not the size, it is the humor.
6. My hand sparkled so much after touching the jewelry that it looked like it joined a fashion show.
7. These hands are short on size, not on jokes.
8. Tiny applause still counts.
9. Mini hands, maximum comedy.
10. Do not underestimate tiny claps.
11. Pocket-sized humor in every hand.

Helping Hand Puns

1. I am always lending a helping pun.
2. Helping hands spread humor.
3. Need a hand? I have jokes too.
4. I hand-deliver laughter.
5. A hand in need is a pun indeed.
6. Hands together for this comedy.
7. Helping hands are handy for claps.
8. Sharing jokes is lending a hand.
9. I cannot help but pun around.
10. These hands were made for helping and humor.

After writing all these hand puns, I feel like I need to give myself a standing ovation, but clapping this much might require an ice pack. My friends always roll their eyes at these jokes, but I know they secretly give me a hand for trying.
Humor is best when it is shared, and I hope these puns gave you a handful of laughter today. Now go ahead, pass these along, and keep spreading smiles hand to hand.